SPIDERS ARE JERKS
Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na.
Spider-man!
I just want your toes.
Don’t hate me.
I just want your face.
Don’t squash.
Wherever you goes
I follow
To get me a taste
Of human.
I’m not a bad person
(Or bug).
It’s just what I do.
Don’t squash.
My life’s about cursin’
Existence
Of people like you.
Don’t hate me.
Oh! I don’t like
flies!
Them’s is lies
Told by entomologists.
No! I have to say
Who’s my real prey.
I’m an arachnophile apologist.
I spin a web
To catch your face.
Not filthy bugs.
It’s you I chase.
I really feed
On human hate.
On your discomfort.
This is my fate.
It’s how I live.
Don’t step down.
It’s no big wonder.
Just run.
So you can just forgive
My actions.
And let me live under
Your bed.
Be ye informed, thou world of things that creepeth. If I see you across the room, I will leave you be. I request that this be a mutual arrangement. You are warned, I do not fear you. And so, if you come too close, I will kill you. You are informed of this capital punishment. And so, it is. Die.
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